The other day, I was looking for a perfect getaway from my normal boring life. Since I couldn’t find one, I opted to watch the movie instead. As you can see, it stars Timothy Olyphant, Steve Zahn, Milla Jovovitch, and three other people I’ve never heard of. If you squint, you might even see that it was written and directed by David Twohy.
A Perfect Getaway, for those of you who found the trailer as forgettable as everyone else I’ve talked to, is a thriller about an ordinary couple who go on a vacation to a secluded beach in Hawaii with two other couples and one of said couples turns out to be a pair of serial killers.
The couples are as follows (referring to the poster):
TOP ROW: Nick (Timothy Olyphant) and Gina (Kiele Sanchez)
MIDDLE ROW: Cliff (Steve Zahn) and Cydney (Milla Jovovich)
BOTTOM ROW: Kale (Chris Hemsworth) and Cleo (Marley Shelton)
I will refer to them as Tim and Gina, Steve and Milla, and Kale and Cleo. This is a mixture of real and character names and makes no sense, but just go with it.
While I wouldn’t call it perfect (obviously) I did enjoy myself. Timothy Olyphant was in it, the scenery was pretty, and there were several helicopters. Only one of these factors is required in order to warrant a “not a waste of two hours” rating, so three of them rates a “pretty good.”
mathematically expressed as follows: Beaches + Timothy Olyphant + Helicopters = Good
And now, on to the questions I would like to pose to this movie. They all start with “why, if” and some of them will spoil you on the ending, so I’m warning you now. You should probably wait to read the rest until after you’ve seen it.