Blog Archives

Trailer Reviews and Predictions for August 13th, 2010

The summer movie onslaught continues this week with four new titles coming out to join the approximately 4 million that are already in theaters vying for our attention/money. A movie will have to be pretty good to draw our attention away from films like Inception and Despicable Me, but that’s not going to stop Eat, Pray, Love, Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, The Disappearance of Alice Creed, and The Expendables from trying. I’ll review the trailers for you so you can see if any of them are going to be worth your time (and money).

Read More

Digg This
Reddit This
Stumble Now!
Buzz This
Vote on DZone
Share on Facebook
Bookmark this on Delicious
Kick It on DotNetKicks.com
Shout it
Share on LinkedIn
Bookmark this on Technorati
Post on Twitter
Google Buzz (aka. Google Reader)

DVD Releases for August 3rd, 2010

Diary of a Wimpy Kid DVD Cover

Diary of a Wimpy Kid

Diary of a Wimpy Kid, which is based on the book of the same name by Jeff Kinney, is the story of a little jerk who walks all over his pals. You can read the full review here, but in short, this movie will be entertaining for kids under ten (mostly boys), but annoying to adults because the main character is so unlikable. Rent it for your kids if you want them to have jerks as a role model.

Buy Diary of a Wimpy Kid on DVD or on Blu-Ray.

Kick Ass DVD Cover

Kick Ass

Jerry Seinfeld once said that all men think of themselves as low level superheroes. If that’s true, then all teenage boys (with their inferior reasoning skills) are dumb enough to act on these fantasies. The ones in Kick Ass sure are, and the result is a hilarious, pseudo-realistic (when it feels like it) depiction of what ordinary people without superpowers can do when they decide to fight back against crime. Definitely rent it if you like comic book movies, action films, superheroes, or clever writing.

Buy Kick Ass on DVD or on on Blu-Ray

Ghost Writer DVD Cover

The Ghost Writer

Not to be confused with Ghost Writer, the PBS kid’s show from the early 90s, The Ghost Writer is the fictitious story of an uncredited writer who is hired to complete the biography of a corrupt politician. It looks very thrilling, as far as thrillers go, what with the hints of murder and everything, and it stars Ewan McGregor and Pierce Brosnan, so I’m guessing it’s a pretty safe bet.

Buy The Ghost Writer on DVD or on Blu-Ray

Heroes Season 4 DVD Cover

Heroes: Season 4

Heroes, a TV show about a world where certain people randomly have superpowers, is a show I never really got into, on account of I tried not to. My schedule already contains too many of those arc-heavy shows where missing one episode makes it impossible to follow what’s going on next time. Therefore, you might guess that if you’re looking to get into Heroes, renting Season 4 is not a good place to start. This DVD set is for existing fans of the show only – ones who are caught up through the end of Season 3.

Buy Heroes: Season 4 on DVD or on Blu-Ray.

Digg This
Reddit This
Stumble Now!
Buzz This
Vote on DZone
Share on Facebook
Bookmark this on Delicious
Kick It on DotNetKicks.com
Shout it
Share on LinkedIn
Bookmark this on Technorati
Post on Twitter
Google Buzz (aka. Google Reader)

Magical Powers: Poll

The Sorcerer’s Apprentice might be Disney’s attempt to capitalize on the immense popularity of the Harry Potter series, but J.K. Rowling is not the first person who has ever used magic in a story. Writers and filmmakers have been telling stories about magic for centuries because we all wish we were more than ordinary – that we could use magic. If given the choice, most people would jump on the opportunity to use magic. But what if you couldn’t emulate Gandalf and Harry Potter and have a wealth of fantastical powers. What if you could only have one?

Which magical power would you choose to have?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Digg This
Reddit This
Stumble Now!
Buzz This
Vote on DZone
Share on Facebook
Bookmark this on Delicious
Kick It on DotNetKicks.com
Shout it
Share on LinkedIn
Bookmark this on Technorati
Post on Twitter
Google Buzz (aka. Google Reader)

Twilight Saga: Eclipse Review

the poster from the Summit Entertainment film Eclipse

As you will know, if you have been reading this blog for any length of time, I am not a fan of the Twilight books. This puts me in a group that represents approximately .0001% of the female population, most of the rest of whom live in caves or can’t read. And yet I not only went to see The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (unnecessarily long title, much?) but am now reviewing it. Has the world gone mad? Well, yes, but that’s not why I did it. I did it because I’m a movie reviewer, and Eclipse is a movie.

For those of you who are in the caves portion of the .0001%, here is what Eclipse is about:

Bella, a human girl, has to get her boyfriend Edward and his vampire clan to co-operate with her almost-other-boyfriend Jacob and his wolf pack in order to fight off an army of evil vampires.

See? As a movie it sounds not awful. This is because there were actually some decent ideas in the Twilight books that were dragged down by poor execution. (Speaking of executions, I’d better say goodbye now before the Twilight fan club shows up at my door to lynch me for the previous statement). Any half decent screenwriter should have been able to extract these ideas and turn them into a pretty good movie.

So let’s see how Eclipse’s director (David Slade) and screenwriter (Melissa Rosenberg) did.

Read More

Digg This
Reddit This
Stumble Now!
Buzz This
Vote on DZone
Share on Facebook
Bookmark this on Delicious
Kick It on DotNetKicks.com
Shout it
Share on LinkedIn
Bookmark this on Technorati
Post on Twitter
Google Buzz (aka. Google Reader)

Twilight in 5 Words or Less

Twilight poster copyright Summit Entertainment

Before becoming an immensely popular film series that effectively ended the private lives of the cast involved with it, Twilight was an incredibly popular book series loved by many teenage girls and their moms and looked upon derisively by those with more than a cursory knowledge of story structure and characterization. I’ll probably get yelled at for this, but bring it on. Here is my review of Twilight in five words or less:

Stalking, angst, sparkles, sap… morons.

Buy Twilight Stuff Cause You Love It Anyway

Digg This
Reddit This
Stumble Now!
Buzz This
Vote on DZone
Share on Facebook
Bookmark this on Delicious
Kick It on DotNetKicks.com
Shout it
Share on LinkedIn
Bookmark this on Technorati
Post on Twitter
Google Buzz (aka. Google Reader)

Ender in Exile: the Film Adaptation

cover of Ender in Exile by Orson Scott Card
I love Orson Scott Card. Ender’s Game and Pastwatch: the Redemption of Christopher Columbus, are on my list of all-time best books I’ve ever read. There’s just something about military-trained underage geniuses saving the world without knowing it that ignites the fascination reflex. I thought it would make a fantastic sci-fi action film, and I eagerly scooped up the many sequels that followed. Though none are quite as awesome as the original, all of them will be prime candidates for future film adaptation, once the Ender’s Game movie finally makes it through development hell and into pre-production.

The space-based Ender sequels (Speaker for the Dead through Children of the Mind) could become a saga of sci-fi mystery thrillers featuring friendly pig-like aliens who, for no reason anyone can figure out, occasionally murder their closest human friends. The Earth-based sequels starring Ender’s former subordinates (all the Shadow of books) could become a sequence of military-political thrillers culminating in Ender’s brother ruling the world. The one sequel I strongly urge the producers to stay away from is the latest: Ender in Exile.

Ender in Exile purports to fill in the gaps between Ender’s Game and the later Ender sequels, which take place far in the future on other worlds. In it, Ender leaves Earth to become governor of a new colony located on a world that belonged to the enemy before Ender wiped them out.

Sounds interesting, right? I thought so too, when I picked it up. Unfortunately, the entire book (based on what I read – I finally gave up about halfway through) is nothing but a bunch of conversations strung together. Apparently it was created by combining the short stories Orson Scott Card wrote to promote his speculative fiction webzine with some filler material and a few references to the other books to please the hardcore fans. The script for such a book, should anyone be foolish enough to try and adapt it, would look something like this:

Katrina Nicholson's spoof screenplay for Ender in Exile by Orson Scott Card

It’s like My Dinner with Andre in space, with occasional set and character changes (okay, so not THAT much like My Dinner with Andre). My point is that all they ever do is talk about the interesting stuff, when they should be doing it. “Show don’t tell” – that’s the number one rule for screenwriters. The entire plot would have to be completely overhauled to make it filmable.

I suppose the book could have gotten better after the halfway mark, but what kind of author forces readers to get through 200 pages of boredom/torture of J.R.R. Tolkien proportions before rewarding them with the good stuff? Not one I want to read! Stacked against the other entries in the Ender series, this one looks like a phone-in job (what happened Orson Scott Card, did you need the money?), which is why I hope Hollywood producers are smart enough to see past the dollar signs in their eyes and give it a pass.

Check out the better Orson Scott Card books

Digg This
Reddit This
Stumble Now!
Buzz This
Vote on DZone
Share on Facebook
Bookmark this on Delicious
Kick It on DotNetKicks.com
Shout it
Share on LinkedIn
Bookmark this on Technorati
Post on Twitter
Google Buzz (aka. Google Reader)

Diary of a Wimpy Jerk… I Mean Kid Review

For all intents and purposes, the terms “middle school” and “junior high” are interchangeable to North Americans, as which one your kid will attend between elementary school and high school varies between states, provinces, and sometimes even school districts. However, if you see the synopsis for Diary of a Wimpy Kid:

A boy with an inflated opinion of himself but no real social skills attempts, through any means necessary, to become popular during his first year of middle school.

…and think “oh, my son/daughter/niece/nephew/ward/charge/etc is in junior high, I should take him/her to see this move and then he/she will be impressed with how well I understand him/her and it will foster a new spirit of openness in our relationship” you are in fact cementing your status (forever) as a clueless adult to which no information on life should ever be imparted (ever).

You see, the difference between middle school (which usually consists of Grades 6-8) and junior high (Grades 7-9) is only a year, it’s a huge year in the development of a child. (FYI, even if your kid actually is in middle school he/she probably still won’t be impressed if you deign to suggest that this might be a good movie to see.)

Read More

Digg This
Reddit This
Stumble Now!
Buzz This
Vote on DZone
Share on Facebook
Bookmark this on Delicious
Kick It on DotNetKicks.com
Shout it
Share on LinkedIn
Bookmark this on Technorati
Post on Twitter
Google Buzz (aka. Google Reader)

The Thorn Birds Miniseries Review: Why does no one else think this is terrible?

 The Thorn Birds: the book

For the longest time, whenever I heard “The Thorn Birds” I thought of “The Thunderbirds”. The former is a novel by Colleen McCullough about the Australian Outback in the 20th Century and the latter is a British television drama featuring marionettes who fly toy rockets and rescue people.

When I did finally get around to reading the Thorn Birds book and learned that it was awesome, I borrowed the video of the Thorn Birds miniseries.

It’s about a girl named Meggie who moves to a sheep station in the Outback with her Irish family and falls in love with an older Catholic priest named Ralph that she can’t marry but keeps trying to bone anyway. For years. Her other family members play into the story as well, as does the Vatican, World War II, and Queensland being very hot, but for the purposes of the miniseries and therefore this review, they’re largely irrelevant.

Usually I feel slightly guilty about not paying for things but am I ever glad I didn’t hand over any money for this one. It saves me the trouble of demanding it back.

Read More

Digg This
Reddit This
Stumble Now!
Buzz This
Vote on DZone
Share on Facebook
Bookmark this on Delicious
Kick It on DotNetKicks.com
Shout it
Share on LinkedIn
Bookmark this on Technorati
Post on Twitter
Google Buzz (aka. Google Reader)

Don’t Read This If You Like Twilight

Don’t read this if you like Twilight. Seriously. If you like Twilight stop reading right the hell now. I don’t want to be shived and/or lynched for my insightful yet true opinions.

Also, don’t read this if you intend to read any of the Twilight books and will get mad at me for spoiling them on you.

Since I was feeling cranky and unsatisfied today I decided to make myself feel better by trashing something. And what more trashable item have I encountered in the last couple of months than the Twilight books by Stephenie Meyer?

The Twilight Saga, consists of four published books: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, and Breaking Dawn plus a fifth unfinished internet-leaked novel called Midnight Sun. All of the books are written from the perspective of a teenage girl named Bella who falls in love with a century-old teenage vampire named Edward.

Click below to read more about them and the problems I think they have.

Digg This
Reddit This
Stumble Now!
Buzz This
Vote on DZone
Share on Facebook
Bookmark this on Delicious
Kick It on DotNetKicks.com
Shout it
Share on LinkedIn
Bookmark this on Technorati
Post on Twitter
Google Buzz (aka. Google Reader)
Page 26 of 26« First...1020«2223242526

SUBSCRIBE TO ZE EMAILS

Subscribe to Ze Feeds

Archives

More Ads By Google

Links by Google