A GOOD DAY TO DIE HARD
Damn. For a Die Hard movie, this trailer is BO-RING. It’s forty seven snoozeworthy seconds before anything explodes. I looked through a bunch of different teasers and trailers on the diehardmovie YouTube account and they were all boring, right out of the gate. Classical music? Flat, uninteresting dialogue? What’s up with that? Are they making us wait for it? Do they think that just because everyone knows the Die Hard franchise that we’ll give it a free pass? Well you won’t get one from me, A Good Day to Die Hard. I think that the Die Hard movies are pretty reliably decent as far as meatheaded action movies go, but this trailer inspires nothing but apathy in me for the new sequel. I won’t be going.
Josh Duhamel, I think you’re hot. I went to see the Transformers sequels, despite the fact that I knew they would be terrible, because you were in them. However, I draw the line at suffering through another sappy Nicholas Sparks tragedy just to watch you get your smolder on. I didn’t mind The Lucky One because Sparks messed it up and the tragedy missed the main characters, or Dear John, because the filmmakers changed the ending, but I’m not going to delude myself into thinking it could happen again. Something obvious and terrible will befall the young lovers (who kinda sound like they’re phoning it in, actually) and tears will be slapped from your face. If Nicholas Sparks wasn’t so famous, the movie adaptations of his novels would be movies of the week on cable, not worldwide theatrical releases.
I’m not a fan of these books. Hell, I haven’t even read them. But I’m SO GLAD the movie adaptation is coming out this week because it means I won’t have to pay like $14 to see the uninspiring new Die Hard movie or another godawful Nicholas Sparks movie. There are several things I find promising about Beautiful Creatures: the disintegrating Southern culture aspect (it’s not completely moving away from the ‘typical American teen’ cliché but it’s a start), the destiny vs choice aspect of whether the main character turns light or dark, the fact that it’s the girl who has the superpower and the boy who’s normal (in teen paranormal romance it’s almost always the other way around) and of course Emma Thompson as an evil witch. Emma Thompson! As an evil witch! Awesome. Looking forward to it.