DVDs for January 3, 2012

Contagion

On Sunday I released my Top 5/Bottom 5 of 2011 list. Guess which movie ranked as #5 worst movie of 2011? That’s right – Contagion! It’s a disease movie that tries to have a broad scope, covering how everyone from single fathers to WHO officials to the CDC reacts to a new global flu crisis. Nothing about millions of people contracting a virulent flu strain should be boring, but this movie is. No tension, no conflict, no point in watching it. Don’t let the presence of so many famous people suck you into renting it. Read my full review for more details.

Buy Contagion on DVD or on Blu-Ray.

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I Don’t Know How She Does It

“I Don’t Know How She Does It” can also describe my confusion over this film’s writer, Aline Brosh McKenna. On one hand, 27 Dresses, Laws of Attraction, and Morning Glory are great. But others, like The Devil Wears Prada, We Bought a Zoo, and this one, make me want to hurt myself. With I Don’t Know How She Does It, a cliched, unfunny comedy about an overworked woman trying to balance her job and her family, some of the blame lies with the ultra-irritating Sarah Jessica Parker. But regardless, watching this movie is like torture. Don’t rent it.

Buy I Don’t Know How She Does It on DVD or on Blu-Ray.
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Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark

Guillermo Del Toro has made some pretty weird movies, so this one, which is about evil little faries who live under the furnace, seems positively cliched by comparison. The story follows a little girl who moves into a new house with her dad and stepmom and is subsequently tormented by said evil little faries, who want bloody teeth and hate the light. The girl is terrified, but apparently has no survival instinct, because she keeps seeking them out. It’s atmospheric, but so ridiculous at times that it’s funny, especially when the creatures talk in their “scary” voices.

Buy Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark on DVD or on Blu-Ray.
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Shark Night

If you’re determined to rent Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark and you want to turn it into a bad horror marathon, Shark Night can be the crown jewel of the evening. It’s kind of like Piranha, in that vicious sea creatures show up in enclosed lakes and eat people, but unlike Piranha, I’m pretty sure Shark Night has no idea how lame it is. If you really need to watch a movie about sharks eating people, just rent Jaws again, because this is another lazy stamping out of the horror formula, just in 3D.

Buy Shark Night on DVD or on Blu-Ray.
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